RJ ‘Rusty’ Botomzswig, owner of Rusty Towing and his inseparable ‘Make America Great Again’ cap, and JJ Snoutsberger, president of the Zeroville First America Committee, are meeting in their favorite watering spot, the Zeroville Proud Redneck Tank.
The mission was to discuss ways of acquiring and holding enough supplies of Pabst Blue Ribbon – PBR — the real folks staple tipple — as news emerge that MillerCoors, which currently brews all of Pabst Brewing’s legacy beers, including PBR may not renew its contract.
Rusty and JJ think that they could make a killing.
However, the establishment’s widescreen TV tuned on Fox TV showing President Trump returning from the Paris visit leads them into a shorter discussion.
The images on the screen excite JJ, who declares, “Our President is always winning. Did you hear that… [the British Prime Minister] Theresa May called him Air Force One to celebrate the Republican Party’s wins in the midterm elections?
“Yeah, that’s something, even after Trump did the right thing to scold her for not doing enough to contain Iran. Iran… Iran … I wudda have punched her in her face! Trump was soft with her!”
Rusty, gulping his pint, declares, “French… wouldn’t call them even lily-livered … they just good for flaky pastry… croi… what… croissant, I guess! Ah that Macron, who has a mama for a wife, wants to raise an army to protect Europe against the U.S., China and Russia. Wuff… DJT put him right in his place reminding him that it was Germany in both of the World Wars. And finally, he made him to shut up and told him to MAKE FRANCE GREAT AGAIN!”
JJ, who can’t stop banging his fist on the table, raises his fist and adds, “Trump is lucky… he has a strong woman for wife. See Michelle Obama was just good at doing hip-hop and growing sprouts in the White House backyard. And see Milania. What a beauty… the way she got [deputy national security adviser] Mira Ricardel fired. This Mira was no small fry… she was a senior official serving in The Administration. Yeah, she deserved it… she was disrespecting Melania’s staff over seating on the plane that the first lady flew to Africa in.
“Yeah, America needs strong leaders.
“Did you see how Donald took care of this Turkish guy… this Err… do… gun or whatever who was distributing tapes of Khashoggi getting killed by the Saudis. OK… Trump didn’t even bother. He let [White House National Security Adviser John] Bolton do the thing… just a curt response that he didn’t hear it. Yeah… it is American jobs and hundred billion coming to us.”
Rusty, puts down his tankard, and offers, “JJ you right! Our president really cares for his family. You see what is happening with [White House chief of staff John F.] Kelly… the guy was trying to save [Homeland Security secretary, Kirstjen] Nielsen’s job. OK so Trump is firing both of them. And Kelly is getting replaced by [Vice President Pence’s chief of staff Nick] Ayers because both Ivanka [Trump] and Jared [Kushner] love this guy. Yes sir, the Big Guy knows how to fire people!”
JJ signaling that he is ordering no more, touches Rusty’s red cap, and bellows, “Rusty, not just in America, but Donald Trump did a great job in Europe too. He told Macron that how did [German invasion] work out for France? He reminded them that they were starting to learn German in Paris before the U.S. came along. He demaded pay for NATO or otherwise! It was D-Day again.”