Pressurizing a Supporter of Israel Qualifies as an anti-Semitic Act

Zevel Shu’al, director of the Institute for the Enforcement of Zionist Values and Sh’tut Nahash, chairman of the Fund for Zionist Exceptionalism are meeting at the all-kosher Y Street Bar in Washington, D.C. to discuss ways of supporting the Saudi crown prince Mohammed Bin Salman (MBS).

Nahash, placing his drink on the table, asks, “I still cannot fathom why is the world so obsessed over [the killing of] this Saudi journalist… or occasional columnist… Jamal Khashoggi. He was their citizen so… at least they didn’t chop off his head in public.

“This Khashoggi brouhaha needs to stop. It must be so stressful for MBS. This should stop. It is tarnishing MBS’ image. He is such a mensch. Haven’t had a Arab with so much  love for Israel.”

Shu’al offers, “We need a vigorous campaign to make the media highlight the fact that Israel’s struggle against Iran is more pressing than anything. We need to get more opinion pieces and more security experts talking about the threat that can become an existential threat for Israel — the threat of a nuclear Iran, the threat of terror, the threat of spreading through Syria and Lebanon. And at the same time, we need these voices to make people understand that Arab states, including Saudi Arabia, are our allies against the spread of Iran and against the Iranian nuclear threat… and endangerment of Israel is simply like the Holocaust situation.”

Nahash, ordering another round of drinks, adds, “We need to dampen Washington Post’s enthusiasm… [Amazon founder] Jeff Bezos is a goy. He cannot understand our pain like the progeny of Eugene Meyer did [owner since 1933, and father of Katherine Graham]. Bezos needs to be told that WaPo’s chest beating for this Khashoggi could place strain on the decades-old alliance between the United States and Saudi Arabia. For God sake, this man was merely a columnist!”

Shu’al, tapping the table, offers, “Sh’tut, we need to be thankful that Donald Trump is president. He won’t let MBS down. Trump has the right attitude: American jobs matter. Period. He has promised to do something… perhaps like keep murmuring about imposing sanctions on individuals responsible for the killing. This can play for months. Like few days ago, [U.S. Secretary of State Mike] Pompeo told a radio outlet that we’re continuing to understand the fact pattern.

“But even then, we need to get this Khashoggi mention off the peoples’ mind.”

Nahash offers, “Indeed. Yes. We should also intensify the Iran as a threat to Israel factor.

“Americans need to be calmed down that, yes, the killing is despicable but that cementing ties with Gulf states in the struggle against Iran was Israel’s overriding concern. Yes, MBS will deliver. Oman is ready… Bahrain is ready… you name it… all Arabs are ready. We need to stress that we are balancing our interests in the area.

“I would say that we make every American know that prime minister Netanyahu has taken a clear position on the importance of stability in the region and Saudi Arabia’s role in consolidating that stability. Every American must internalize that Iran is a bigger threat and those who want to punish the kingdom [Saudi Arabia] need to bear that in mind.”

Shu’al quickly adds, “Our best approach should be to highlight what MBS told Jared Kushner, that Khashoggi was a member of the Muslim Brotherhood. You know this is a group long opposed by national security adviser John Bolton and other senior Trump officials. I would say we add more, like he was member of Hamas… al Qaida… and more… why not tie him to 9/11 too.”

Nahash declares, “I agree. Zevel we should also drill into American minds that Israel considers Iran to be the main threat to its safety and supports our withdrawal from the 2015 nuclear deal with Tehran… the useless sheaf papers that Obama signed.”

Shu’al thumping Nahash’s back adds, “All this is perfect but we also need to keep telling Americans that MBS is a treasure chest of jobs… the golden bird that should be protected. We need to tell them that it is our existential duty to make sure that Iran does not continue the malign activities.

“I mean there are good people… like you have [Egyptian President Abdel Fatah] al-Sissi… he is as enthusiastic as we are on closing this murder brouhaha. Now what we are seeing is that as if Iran was not enough, we have Turkey too… this [Recep Tayyip] Erdoğan… is he trying to become the new sultan of Turkey.

“We need a massive campaign to make people realize that pressurizing a supporter of Israel qualifies as an anti-Semitic act.”

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