Former Pakistan President Asif Ali Zadari has summoned his inner circle Pakistan Peoples Party (PPP) Senator and former Finance Minister Naveed Qamar, who was a roommate of Prime Minister Shahid Khaqan Abbasi during his college days in California; Senator Aitizaz Ahsan, MNA Khursheed Shah, former minister Qamar Zaman Kaira, and Senator Sherry Rahman.
The former president and PPP co-chairman is clearly agitated. His ego has been badly hurt when Prime Minister Abbasi left without comment the suggestion to name the new Islamabad International Airport for Benazir Bhutto. For the PPP and Asif Zardari, it was the much-needed pre-election resource. If his party had its way, it would be adjective loaded, Shaheed Mohtrarama Benazir Bhutto International Airport – the party-proclaimed martyrdom is among their election resources. Of there is the perpetually alive ZA Bhutto, whose party-proclaimed martyrdom is source of many votes.
“Naveed … what happened to your old college ties and all that, when Abbasi has not responded to named the airport after great and beloved martyr, the real queen of Pakistan, Benazir?
“You know I have an MA or MS from the London School of Education, and if any of my roommates or contemporaries was involved, I would have gotten it done eons ago? Did you try to share Abbasi’s girlfriend that he has no regard for you … I know that this whole Nawaz Sharif lot is rotten!
“All Nawaz knows is to cry why the court kicked him out. You all know that I am the only Pakistani whose money laundering activities has a chapter in the proceedings of U.S. Senate Finance and Banking Committee.
“Now this small time crook, who has developed airs since the Supreme Court judge called him a godfather, is going around talking about me. He forgets that on May 14, 2006, our Shaheed Benazir signed a Charter of Democracy – our Messaq Jamhooriat — with him, where rights of both families were enshrined: the children of both families will be taking turns ruling Pakistan and enjoy all the perks to their fullest ability.
“Aitizaz, you are an intellectual and you understand so succinctly that how genes matter. Ours is a STD … Sexually Transmitted Democracy. Our Shaheed Benazir had the right to rule because she was the daughter of our Shaheed, the Respected Mr. Bhutto.
“All of you are here and continue to enjoy the perks of upholding STD.
“Now the son of an ironmonger, Nawaz … and you all know how trustworthy he is. He encouraged me to issue a strong-worded statement against the army generals. I am sure now they have sent a word, and this son of an ironsmith, is trying stick all on me.
“Now his de-seated foreign minister of his, Khawaja Asif is telling me that Nawaz Sharif has done huge favors to Asif Ali Zardari but I have ditched him. He is claiming that I told Bilawal that I had become the PPP co-chairman solely due to his help and cooperation.
“Aitizaz … Sherry … isn’t this much too much!”
They chime in unison, “Certainly our respected and beloved Mr. Co-chairman. Everyone in Pakistan owes it to our beloved martyr, the ever-present Zulfikar Ali Bhutto.”
“Indeed Aitizaz and Sherry. You know if I tell the people of Sind that it is ZAB and BB who taught them how to defecate, they will believe it without even batting any eye.
“Yes, indeed, I, Asif Ali Zardari owe it all to the Bhutto family. Not just Asif Al Zardari but all of us. In fact, our great and respected martyr, ZA Bhutto created the real Pakistan. I shudder at the thought that East Pakistan was with us as the country’s most populated province. Would Punjab get in a squeak … Would Sind get in a squeak?
“Our beloved martyr Mr, Bhutto was a real … or I must say that he is the real visionary. He knew if East Pakistan remained stuck to us, we would have never gotten to head any government! Despite being an MA or MS from London School of Education, I would be nothing … not the President of Pakistan.
“Let me digress here for a minute … You know how Nawaz let loose NAB and other federal agencies against our party in Sindh and against all of us. I got this for supporting Nawaz Sharif in the past for the sake of establishing civilian supremacy. Despite my efforts of maintaining cordial relations with him so we loot Pakistan together, Nawaz Sharif took undue advantage of my good intentions and betrayed me on every occasion.
“So Naveed Qamar, where was I? Yes … about this naming of the new Islamabad Airport after our beloved martyr, Benazir.
“Now Nawaz is claiming that I requested him to indemnify Gen. Pervez Musharraf’s acts through parliament but he refused. Yes, why would I allow Musharraf to be tried because I knew the General’s lawyers would stick the blame of her murder on me.”
Naveed Qamar speaks out, “Our Respected President Zardari, I know this Abbasi since his youth. He is so beholden to Nawaz that he is just cooling his heals and will silently sneak in the name of Nawaz Sharif on the airport.”
“Yes, yes, yes … Naveed you are absolutely right. Only and only Bhutto is the ONLY Acceptable Name on everything in Pakistan. I am not an egotist. I would gladly get my name put on Hyderabad or Bahawalpur airport, but it is the new international airport and Bhutto is the only name that belongs to it.
“We have powerful presence in the Senate, I would say that we rename Rawalpindi as Shaheed Zulfikar Ali Bhutto Township. Yes, a trifle long but nothing can match our great leader’s contribution … his sacrifice!
“We … all of us owe it to our great leader Shaheed Zulfikar Ali Bhutto. By jettisoning East Pakistan, he has created opportunities for everyone.
“It is the Bhutto name that counts! If East Pakistan was still with Pakistan, being the most populous province, they would have occupied everything. But our great and genius leader ZA Bhutto freed us from this horror! And do those Bengalis breed! Their numbers would have never let us go anywhere.
“ZA Bhutto has created a dynasty. If there was no Bhutto in power … if the people of Sind were not intellectually challenged, there would no Bhutto Power. Even if I had gotten married to Benazir, I would have been just be a ticket seller in Bambino Cinema and our Great BB would have been teaching English in Karachi Grammar School.
“Naveed Qamar, this meeting, this group of great leaders and thinkers is assigning you to lobby your former college mate … to lobby Abbasi that Bhutto is the ONLY Acceptable Name for the airport and indeed all structures!