Challenge Accepted

Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif is in a high-level huddle at his private quarters at 44000 Constitution Avenue, Islamabad, Pakistan.
Since 1973, the address, the Prime Minister’s Secretariat, has been the official prime ministerial residence.
Seated around the table is his inner circle: Punjab Chief Minister and younger brother Shahbaz Sharif, father-in-law of Sharif’s daughter Asma Nawaz, and Finance Minister Ishaq Dar, First Daughter Maryam Nawaz Safdar … err Maryam Nawaz, Federal Minister of Information, Broadcasting, and National Heritage Pervez Rashid, Pakistan Muslim League (N) Secretary General Danyal Aziz, and Punjab Law Minister Rana Sanaullah Khan.
Pervez Rashid has placed before the assembled the news item from the October 17, 2016 issue of daily Dawn newspaper’s Images section, headlined: “This video of Imran Khan’s fitness routine will scare Nawaz Sharif, says PTI.”
The Prime Minister takes a hurried look at the headline and buzzes for his khoya-topped glass of lassi.
The top man’s brow is creasing and the looks are unpleasing. The ever-vigilant Rana and the ever-eager-for-a-ministerial-post Danyal Aziz, as if in synchronization, blurt out: “We need to come up a challenge this Imran Khan cannot even think about!”
The Information Minister chimes in, “My ministry will get this challenge known in nanoseconds, Sir Sahib, Your Excellency!”
The ever accountant Dar, “Just let me know the budget and I will get the allocation rolling.”
The Prime Minister, with the invigorating gulps of lassi within, still has his brow creased, when the indomitable Rana declares, “Your Excellency, you know I had my qeema-filled parathas this morning. Indeed, I had six of them. They work like tonic for me. Perhaps I was discerning some challenge awaited me. And lo and behold, I come here and Pervez Sahib, our beloved voice to the nation, shows me this foolish news item.
“Is Imran doing a jalsa, I mean jalsee! Pervez Sahib needs to fix the media properly. I mean our respected Dar Sahib never turns down an allocation for envelopes for the media people. And still, I mean still the media is giving exposure to Imran like he has done a five-wicket haul. PTI is gathering one thousand and the media is saying 100,000!
“See this is what Dawn is saying, ‘Going by this workout video, here’s how the 64-year-old stays in shape:
1) Toe touch crunches
2) Bicycle crunches
3) Side-to-side obliques
4) Knee Ins
5) Basic crunches with knees up’
“So!
“Your Excellency and the respected people in the service of our beloved Prime Minister Sahib, I have an excellent idea!
“We are challenging Imran Khan to a Nihari-eating contest! This will take out seems of his exercises, like he has been hit for six 6s in an over!
“My honorable Pervez Sahib, we will put the video of our beloved and respected Prime Minister finishing a whole daig – I think in English they would call it a cooking cauldron – before breakfast! Yes, before breakfast! Now beat that!
“Yes Sir! Now tell me which true-son-of-his-mother in this whole wide world can match this feat?”
Pervez Rashid and Danyal Aziz interject in unison: “This is a winning idea from our great Rana Sahib. We would show that our honorable Prime Minister finished a big daighchi of Siri Paya too on top of the daig of Nihari!”
The Prime Minister, moved by such capital ideas, declares: “I would do six glasses of lassi with it!”
The attendees raise their fists in jubilation, and the Prime Minister draws the attention of his brother Shahbaz, “Now Shahbaz Sahib will arrange for Nihari and Siri Paya at our favorite place!”
First Daughter Maryam, ever vigilant of rendering her contribution, hails the move, stating that the Prime Minister will do the meal at the Nihari shop. Of course, Uncle Shahbaz will arrange topmost level of security.
She says, “Have you all seen Imran’s video? You see how it has been shot at an actual gym. So we have to do an actual venue video too! The Nihari eating done at the shop.
“Rana Sahib, I am being told that currently the best Nihari place is Muhammadi Nehari on Bahawalpur Road in Mozang Chungi.
“And Pervez Uncle, I have the headline too to beat Imran Khan’s 64-year old gym shots, we will proudly announce: ‘Sixty-six year old Prime Minister Demolishes a Full Daig of Nehari, a Deghchi of Siri paya, and downs 6 tall glasses of lassi’ Now eat your hearts out PTI! Puff!”
The Prime Minister places his loving hand of the First Daughter’s head, and declares, “OK folks. It is settled. Muhammadi Nehari on Bahawalpur Road in Mozang Chungi.”
Maryam Nawaz again bellows in: “And let Imran Khan eat pudding!”
The Prime Minister takes down another glass of lassi and the meeting concludes.

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