Ready for the Cull

The Donald is addressing the core group of his campaign merchandise marketing team at the Trump Tower in New York City.

We are doing a great job at moving those hats. I admire you guys. Now don’t quote me on that but … hahaha … with this kind of demand we may need to rush a few container loads of ‘em from … Mexico … ha ha ha.

The mood all around is jovial and confident. All feel like in the company of the next president of the United States.

Folks, you all know that the Trump name is synonymous with construction. I am therefore introducing construction hats as another campaign merchandise.


Yes Sir. That’s a great idea!

Amidst the glee, Threep Finglevood who traveled from North Dakota to be part of this exciting experience raises his hand.

Sir, indeed, it is a great idea, but lets not do with fake hats, but real time heavy-duty construction hats.

Wow … Threep you are on the dot!

Sir, I don’t care on whose construction site they are working, but they should be wearing our, the Trump hat. Yes, OSHA standards hats.

Wow … Threep you are on a roll. That’s all set.

Another hand rises. It is Skipps Thronsteinberg from Montana.

Yes, Skipps.

Sir, we can offer personally autographed hats to all the important people coming on board. Like big donors.

Yes Skipps that can be done. But do I need donors! Even by Forbes’ stunted calculation, I am worth more than $5 billion.

And Paris and now San Bernardino are heaven sent. The Trump nomination is sealed … a done deal.

Folks, before coming to meet with you, this morning, I called Jerry Falwell Jr. … Jerry, the president of Liberty University. I told him that his message rings sound and clear when he advised “… that if more good people had concealed-carry permits, then we could end those Muslims before they walk in and kill.”

I told him that he has to join the Trump ticket as our Vice President. You know, he mentioned his Dad and the University, but I am sure that he is on our ticket!

Let’s start thinking campaign buttons, signs, pennants!

And right after calling Jerry … the Vice President, I called our National Security Advisor … Trump gestures, asking for a response. … Pamela Geller. Yes, the national authority on Islam and Muslims.

After this meeting, I am calling Dr. Ben Carson. You know how I told the Republican Jewish Coalition the other day that “I’m a negotiator — like you folks.”

I am going to put it straight to Ben that although there is no doubt about his American birth, but after eight years of Barack Hussein Obama. Yes Barack Hussein! There is NO place for any black or brown or yellow or whatever president of the United States for the next millennium. And I am going to tell Ben that how indeed we share our outlook on Muslims, and he should be my Secretary of Homeland Security.

The Team Trump is coming up! Jerry, Ben …

About those hats, especially the hats that Threep has asked for, I am going to get a warning printed inside that they are NOT TO BE SOLD TO MUSLIMS. Do we want them Muslims to protect their heads when we get to work on them January 20, 2017!

Do we?

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